The first essay is to prove to you that I have a childhood -- When they come for me -- The hands that held me -- Young girls they do get weary -- Yaka -- Becoming a liar -- Tehuti -- The quiet before -- Take two for pain -- Like a war -- This is what happens -- What it feels like -- Beauty in the breakdown -- It has a name -- Side effects may include -- Life sentence -- As hopeless as smoke -- The day before -- We don't wear blues -- Some days are fine -- When we bleed -- Searching for magic,

"Ikpi explores her life--as a Nigerian-American immigrant, a black woman, a slam poet, a mother, a daughter, an artist--through the lens of her mental health and diagnosis of bipolar II and anxiety. Her ... memoir in essays implodes our preconceptions of the mind and normalcy as [she] bares her own truths and lies for us all to behold with ... honesty and ... intimacy"--Publisher marketing.